Alex: I am over 3,000 years old and the most
flexible fossil ever recorded.
The winter of 2009, around Valentine‘s Day?
where are you from:
A: I was born in New York City but I have lived in Washington, D.C., Florida, Rhode Island, Colorado, and Vermont. I just tell people I‘m from Colorado.
R: Los Angeles is my birthplace, but I grew up in the mountains of Colorado on a road called Rainbow Hill.
instruments you use:
A: I play drums and share lead vox with Robin. But I also can play guitar, keys, bass, skronky violin and theremin!
R: My sea foam green electric guitar and the sounds that come outta my mouth.
A: We were bored and knew we needed punk rock to properly sculpt our lives. I‘d bought the drum kit I‘d always wanted, but had to be content with it set up and untouched in my Denver apartment. I‘d had a few lessons, but when I found out my instructor didn‘t know who Devo was I quit and decided to skip to the part where I formed a band. Robin was gifted a shiny black guitar and my friends had a warehouse in Boulder where we could practice. So we schlepped up there a few times and messed around. It came out kinda twee the first few times so we put the kibosh on that and started over. Then we got a new practice space in Denver, a punk greasepit with a skate ramp called the Blast-O-Mat. That was where we played and wrote all of our early songs, until they changed the locks on us.
R: I worked at this killer clothing store/show space in Denver called Chielle and Alex came in one day to drop off flyers for an art society she was starting called Krebstar. She looked like the coolest girl I had ever seen and I knew I had to be friends with her, so I went to the meeting at this magical gypsy coffee house and was the only person she didn‘t know who showed up. So I got my wish and we became friends. I remember the band starting for real in my heart when I was very sick in the hospital at age 19. They must‘ve been pumping my IV with some rock n roll magic, cause I had always wanted to start a band but I knew when I got out of there I had to do it for real. I recall writing Alex a doped up, pain-med haze Myspace message about how we had to start Lust-Cats. And once they let me out of the hospital, we did!
what’s your message?
A: Have fun and don‘t be a dillhole!
R: Be kind, spread the magic of rock n roll throughout the universe, & do what you want. Basically, what Alex said.
do you play shows and how do they look like?
A: Shows! Oh, boy! We LOOOVE shows! Shows are when we let our hair down and put on lipstick and subject everybody in the room to our dumb dad jokes. Sometimes we‘re in costumes or glitter and sometimes we bring fake blood. Robin sways like a mermaid in seaweed and points her guitar around like a magic wand, and I slap the drums around and holler til a vein pops out on my forehead.
what was the craziest show you’ve ever played?
A: Halloween in Boulder! Someone crowd-surfed into the ceiling fan.
R: R.I.P. Astroland. That show was the best. Alex wore a white bunny suit and dumped fake blood all over her head halfway through the set. I was dressed as Pippi Longstocking and kept accidentally stabbing people with my wire braids.
what was the worst and why?
A: On this last tour, a show in Florida was pretty bogus. The kids hated us before we even got onstage, and nobody would let us crash at their house. I‘m not sure what it was--- I think maybe we were looking too frilly and they thought we were a bunch of bimbo chumps. But I had some pretty good tacos and fried plantains before we got there, so it wasn‘t all bad. And then because no one would take us home, we checked into a motel and spied on a bunch of naked people punching each other on the next balcony. There were all kinds of people coming out onto that balcony when that fight started. There was a half-naked lady with a rolling suitcase who ran out, and even a little kid. We still don‘t know what really went down, but the cops came. The next morning there were novelty sex handcuffs on the lawn.
R: But the thing about the worst shows is that they always make then best stories.
what are your future plans?
A: Tour and play til we get feeble and hunched with age and we hafta hire someone to dust us off and massage us and prop us up onstage.
R: Write songs, drive around, play music, and make friends. Over and over.
are you going for the big deal or are you more the d.i.y. type?
A: Big deals aren‘t ever what they‘re cracked up to be. If you want something done right, you‘ve gotta do it yourself!! But we‘re still interested in our own line of bath products and temporary tattoos, and if Taco Bell wants to step up give us free bean burritos for life, we‘ll do the dance!
R: DIY all the way, even though we have some really good ideas for bath products. Toxic Pool bath bombs & Revenge Bikini Body butter. But in reality, we will probably just end up making those ourselves.
your 3 favorite bands:
A: RAMONES, B-52s, The Misfits? It changes all the time! Except for the RAMONES--- I never get sick of them.
R: Hole, Patsy Cline, & Blink 182.
A: Hummus and carrots, lamb with mint jelly, saag paneer with all the fixins.
R: Ice cream of any flavor, drunken noodles, and yep, saag paneer.
your 3 favorite movies:
A: Amadeus is my very favorite. Desperate Living---any John Waters movie really, and Wayne‘s World!
R: Heathers, Clueless, & The Wizard of Oz.
your 3 favorite books:
A: Boswell, by Stanley Elkin, about a dude who learns it‘s his destiny to be a strongman, anything by James Tate, and Harriet the Spy, by Louise Fitzhugh.
R: Hard-Boiled Wonderland and the End of the World by Haruki Murakami, Ariel by Sylvia Plath, and Matilda by Roald Dahl.
your 3 favorite records:
A: FAMILY MATTERS by Happy Jawbone Family Band--- a hyperactive glee opus! HAPPY ENDING by Velvet Davenport, my favorite cheeky elf drug music. THE WAY OF THE VASELINES, by the Vaselines.
R: All time is too daunting. But this week I‘ve been listening to a lot of Hardcore Girls Are A Hoax by Night of Joy, Was Dead by King Tuff, & Gypsy Pervert by Mannequin Pussy.
your 3 favorite venues:
A: BarBar and Rhinoceropolis in Denver, where the beer flows like wine, and Nobby‘s in St. Augustine, where everybody‘s like a big rock n‘ roll family...even before you use all those drink tickets up!
R: I love those three & I‘d also add Sidewinder in Denver, which my friend Erica says feels haunted but has all of Pinkerton on the jukebox!
your 3 favorite hobbies:
A: I enjoy tapping into the occult, eating, and going on daytrips by myself.
R: Writing in notebooks in bed, going on adventures, & cooking food for my friends.
your favorite joke:
A: I have two. Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread. Did you know Helen Keller had a dollhouse? Neither did she!
R: Anything that comes out of Maria Bamford‘s mouth. She‘s the best.
your 3 favorite animals:
A: I like kitty cats, squirrel monkeys, and the little lizards that run around in Florida.
R: My dear departed kitty Moocher, my roommate‘s sweet puppy Mr. Mister, & the Happy Jawbone hedgehog Hercules.
3 things you totally need on stage:
A: I need at least one beer. I also need to be wearing something on the bottom that won‘t ride up when I sit down. And reverb!
R: Babely dudes in the audience, a glass of red wine, & the vial of Moocher‘s ashes I carry in my leather jacket.
A: I wish I could turn into a sexy man whenever I pleased. I wish to never have to live on Mars. Earth RULES! I hate that idea. Why do people think that‘s such a great idea?? I also wish that beautiful old things never had to go away, or that someone would invent "time vacations" and you could go live in the 1700s or 1965 for a week with your honey and your best friend.
R: I wish for kind creative weirdos to benevolently rule the planet, love & kindness to reign, and someone to take me out to a nice steak dinner.
what do you fight?
A: The Man!!! The squares and the finks!!
R: Evil spirits, exclusivity, & anyone who tries to ruin my fun.
what’s your best song eva and why?:
A: "Toxic Pool" is my surefire favorite. It comes apart when you play it and it makes people run around and fall down on each other.
R: My favorite is "Nothing Cool (Happens on Dates)" because the sentiment continues to become truer and truer as the years go by. But I wanna be proved wrong!